As societal gender norms break down and the traditional binary system becomes a thing of the past, it can be difficult to know where you fit in. Fear not, confused reader! With this handy how-to guide, you too can identify as the gender that fits you best.

Step one: take a good long look in the mirror. If you see a beard, congratulations! You’re one of the boys. If you see breasts, sorry pal, but you’re stuck with the ladies. But wait, what if you’re one of the unlucky souls with neither? Fear not, for there are other ways to determine your gender.
Step two: consider your favorite color. Because obviously, that has everything to do with your gender identity. If you prefer blue, obviously you’re a boy. If you like pink, you’re a girl. If you like yellow, well… we don’t really know what to do with you.
Step three: take a gender identity test online. There are plenty of quizzes out there that promise to tell you what gender you “really” are, based on questions like “what’s your favorite animal?” and “do you prefer cats or dogs?” Because clearly, those are the definitive indicators of gender identity.
Step four: forget everything you just read. Gender identity is a deeply personal thing, and while these silly markers might provide a chuckle, they’re not going to tell you anything that you don’t already know deep down inside. It’s okay to be confused, and it’s okay not to fit neatly into one box or another. The important thing is to be true to yourself, whatever that may mean for you.
In conclusion, there’s no surefire way to determine what gender you identify as. It’s a deeply personal journey that only you can take, and while these silly markers might provide a bit of entertainment, they’re not really going to tell you anything useful. Embrace who you are, whatever that may be, and don’t let anyone else try to tell you otherwise. And hey, if all else fails, just pick a color and roll with it.